Thursday, November 27, 2014

You Say there is a Method...

What am I most thankful for?  I'd like to say I'm thankful for food and stuff.  But honestly, I'm talking to the well fed here.  If you have some gadget by which to read this, I assume you may know where you next meal is coming from. I'm not suggesting that you should not be thankful for this, but we, the well fed, need to go deeper sometimes when we thank the universe for our particular brand of stuff.

I'd like to say I'm thankful that I'm sane, because I've been insane.

I'd like to think I'm talking to the sane here, but there is also something inside of you that flickers isn't there?  Some say it is a light, some call it a darkness.  Some deny its existence, those are the ones to watch out for...    

I'm thankful for my madness. 

Without a touch of madness what would I be?  I would be regular, there would be no magic.  If there is anything to write home about here I owe it to my crazy side.  The side that doesn't sleep...

I laugh sometimes a little louder...because the world is funny.  And I sing a little more out of tune, because I want my own song.  And I dance backwards but I know which way I'm not going.  

Without the insanity, how would I even know I'm sane?  How would I appreciate it?  I mean I could, but not this way. I truly love being alive.  I truly don't understand it.  I love that...

I'm sitting in a bookstore, comfy and warm.  There is a man who is mentally impaired walking around me talking to himself loudly. And I want to reach out to him, I don't know why.  He must know, in his life he must know that he is OK.  I want to tell him that he is OK. 

If he's OK, I think maybe I'm OK.  

I guess I'm thankful I'm not mentally impaired.  Except when I think about the book Flowers for Algernon.  It's a book about a guy who is mentally impaired and then has a surgery that makes him genius level intelligent.  He is happy when he is impaired and unhappy when he is smart.  The question is, what would you wish for, ignorant bliss or intelligent unhappiness?  Most of us would wish to be intelligent wouldn't we.  Why?  What has it done for you lately? 

Yeah, you can be smart and happy.  It's just hard once you take everything into account.  Right now, in this moment, I feel content. I'm in my sacred place, my bookstore.  I'm writing, which is sacred to me.  Call me ignorant.  The world is still on fire.    

They are selling Fifty Shades of Grey on a table next to me at my temple.  I could be angered that this crap sells, while great literature is forgotten.  However, even that isn't bothering me now. Sometimes you feel peace or bliss so intrinsically that nothing can break that trance.

I'm thankful for that.


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