Aussi

Aussi

Sunday, January 17, 2010

Guilt

I decided something today, while feeling bad that I had neglected my poor little blog. I decided that I can do this thing on my whim. I can do anything really. I thought maybe I was letting someone down by not posting my blog every day. Then I realized I wasn't letting anyone down, not even myself. I made a vow to record my life or live it, or something. My life. If I have to apologize to my very blog, for leaving it empty, where does that leave me in terms of being the master of my own universe?

I think when you write you want to create your own Universe, you want to own it, express it, create it. Without sounding like an idiot.

I took a hiatus from my small blog universe. I wanted to be remembered, you see, for this blog, for writing something profound. But I realized I've got time, an entire lifetime actually, to make my mark.

So what do I want to talk about today? There's like so much shit, so much that has happened, so much that is happening. I'm watching the Golden Globes and thinking about the recent earthquake in Haiti. There are moments I wish on was on that Golden Globe stage accepting an award for best screenplay. The next minute I wish I was underneath some rubble, all the way across the world, digging out bodies.

But I suppose sitting here writing about movie legends and dead bodies will have to do. It is interesting to me that Hollywood makes movie after movie about catastrophic events, yet if everyone who bought a ticket to see Avatar spent that ten dollars for relief efforts in Haiti, maybe I don't know.

Don't get me wrong, I spent the money to see Avatar and it was worth every penny. And I don't have any money so I didn't give any for the Haiti Earthquake. I guess I could have given that ten dollars. Maybe I could have saved one life or something.

So how do you decide then? Decide the right thing to do? Decide if you are a good person or just some lame idiot who would rather watch blue people in a jungle then help real people in a real jungle.

But again, who am I gonna apologize to? And do we need to apologize sometimes for just going to the movies? Maybe but I'm not going to.

nina